Sunday 2007

2015/01/img_3403.jpg
Something I realized while working on this anniversary series of posts is that I more strongly associate the events with the days of the week than the dates. So I’m changing the context. We’re jumping from Wednesday to anSunday, that occurred eight years ago.

It was the first time that I referred to my honey as my boyfriend. This was after just 6 days of dating! Can you believe it? Apparently I was not worried about jinxing myself. Granted, I called him “my boyfriend” in conversation with a meth head selling a dresser on Haight Street. But as you will learn tomorrow, The Monday that brackets my week of anniversaries from 2007, I did jinx myself. Just not in the way you expect.

BTW that bat face on top? That’s my brother’s new puppy.

Today’s bangles: ivory bangle from Goodwill, Hermès yellow bangle, tiny tortoise shell bangle from Goodwill

2015/01/img_3406.jpg

Advertisements

Hump Day 1.17.2007

Really? Do I really need to explain the anniversary on this one? Let’s just say, give me the right setting, a little take out food, a barely furnished apartment, a big brown dog, and the guy I met two nights prior in 2007…

We watched American Idol. For my very first time. I definitely mentioned that part in yesterday’s post. I couldn’t bring myself to link anything American Idol *shudder* so instead is the Haim song I like the most right now. It sort of works with the memory theme, right?

In case you are just tuning in, I’m telling the story of a very life changing week. It started with meeting a guy at a bar on a Monday, back in 2007. Not to give too much away but the timeline is a Monday to Monday string of events.

Some days were less interesting. Like Wednesday. It was a very regular day, I think. Except that it formally counts as “our first date” being that I went over to Aaron’s barely furnished apartment and we watched American Idol and I met the Moosehead. He was a hell of a dog. Before AI we took the Moose up to Alamo Square dog park. We also hit up Bar 861 on Divisadero for happy hour. I think this was all the same day. Regardless, it has become a conflated memory of a date.

What I can tell you concretely, this was the day that I wrote this to my best friend:
“I met such a cute guy last night- this is his myspace pic. And he already called and we’re watching american idol and eating dinner tonight smile emoticon hooray!”

Oh wait, so I guess I watched American Idol on Tuesday? Oops. Must change the time line.
To be cont.

2015/01/img_3401.jpg
Today’s bangles: yellow Hermès from my brother, Angela Cummings from my mom, and an Alaska charm bracelet of my mom’s from when she was a girl.

Boobs On The Brain

Don’t think I didn’t notice that you all clicked on my other boobs post. What, were you too shy to comment? Don’t you worry though, because I’ve got boobs on the brain. Probably because I’m trying to buy a new bra. Trying being the operative word here.

You lady readers know what I’m talking about. You fellas? Well, trying to buy a new bra is similar to buying new socks in levels of tediousness. That is, if socks cost $72, each one fit differently, sizing was inconsistent, and sometimes, even after you think you’ve found the ideal comfortable sock, even then it doesn’t work under a t-shirt. Now, I don’t know what you are doing putting your t-shirts over your socks. That’s your business.

But so, I’ve now purchased (and returned) six bras in an effort to find one god damn bra. It doesn’t help matters that I’m currently injecting my body full of hormones. As anybody transitioning to female (or my fellow IVFers) can attest these hormones throw your top dimensions all out of whack. The situation has gotten to the point where my MOM commented on my boobs. I think that right there should remain exclusively an initial rite of womanhood, not to be repeated when 35. It usually happens when you are in your tweens/teens. Your mom or grandma or Auntie or mom’s best friend takes you aside and says “You need a good bra.”

“Welcome to womanhood, first lesson: everyone is now entitled to express their opinions about your body. Second lesson: you need a good bra.”

So far this is the only bra that I’ve found and liked:
Totally A Bra
What? You got something to say about my shopping technique? But you won’t, will you? Because this post is about boobs and bras, and everybody looks at these posts but few are comfortable commenting.

Walking Dead Head

IMG_3205.PNG
You know how there are all these question blog awards? Well finally, thanks to Sup Darling and Dora there’s a long overdue The Walking Dead Zombie Award Blog Questions and Answers. See Sup Darling’s post here.

First rule of ZABQA, thank Dora and Sup Darling for their genius idea. Second rule, answer some questions and tag people! Who can then decide if they want to answer Qs or not and tag people or not. Nota Bene, I found the above image on Etsy and it’s made by Amaranthasashes

The Walking Dead Tag

1. Walkers, Lurkers, Biters, Lame-brains, Geeks, or Rotters, which is it?
2. You just woke up to a zombie apocalypse. What is your weapon of choice?
3. Now that you have your weapon, choose your partner. Who will it be?
4. Location is everything, where will your camp be?
5. Who is dead that you wish were still alive?
6. Who is alive that you wish were dead?
7. Which character is the most evil of all time?
8. If you had a baby during an apocalypse, which character would you put in charge to care for your child?
9. Hey leader, your call: the needs of your loved ones or the needs of many?
10. What’s the biggest lesson TWD taught you about surviving a zombie apocalypse?

Before my answers you know I have to seek out and showcase some jewelry. Here the dead, imaginary item that I found today made by Susan Elnora.

IMG_3206.JPG
Unicorn skull necklace! Very cool.

Now for my answers:
1. Walkers, Lurkers, Biters, Lame-brains, Geeks, or Rotters, which is it?
Zombies, they will always be zombies to me.
2. You just woke up to a zombie apocalypse. What is your weapon of choice?
Baseball bat with the handle carved to a pointed stake. Because you can’t go wrong with some brute force but there’s quick extraction in a stabby situation.
3. Now that you have your weapon, choose your partner. Who will it be?
It comes down to Michonne or Darryl. They are pretty equal in a lot of ways but Michonne is a better problem solver. However, Darryl has some equipment I may want at the end of the world, and I’m not talking about his crossbow. Final decision? Rick. He’s got the best of both of them and hopefully he won’t become unhinged.
4. Location is everything, where will your camp be?
CDIC, that place was the perfect fortress. I would take out the nutjob in charge first.
5. Who is dead that you wish were still alive?
Dale. I liked him better than Hershel, what?
6. Who is alive that you wish were dead?
Father Asshole
7. Which character is the most evil of all time?
The Governor: rapist, murderer, psycho, need I say more?
8. If you had a baby during an apocalypse, which character would you put in charge to care for your child?
Now this q stumps me, because why can’t I be that person? Second choice Tyrese
9. Hey leader, your call: the needs of your loved ones or the needs of many?
I’m selfish, my loved ones.
10. What’s the biggest lesson TWD taught you about surviving a zombie apocalypse?
Why don’t they consider climbing into trees to escape zombies? I don’t think zombies would know to look up so long as you keep quiet. Other lesson? All the time smear yourself in zombie gut camo. Why do they ever not do this?

Now Jack Flacco, zombie author, how would you answer these q’s? And Susan? How about Olive Vienna?

The Great Gift Idea Marathon

Tiffany box
Tiffany charm’s are pretty much universally beloved, but I am here to search out for you something special this holiday season. Think of me as your personal shopper. Welcome to 16 days of jewelry gift ideas for the special lady (mom, grandma, lover, daughter, sister, saint) or kind sir (father, brother, boyfriend etc.) in your life. It’s the time of the year where Very Bangled —-> Very Gifted.

Now, as you all know, I own a shop. I trudge thru the front lines of the gift giving mania each year. With my many years of battle scars I have several tried and true gift giving theories. Listen up, because I aim to hit these targets on your behalf for 16 days leading up to the holidays.

1. Most women love a gift tradition. I don’t know what came first, my love of bracelets or my dad giving me bracelets. But now almost my entire collection is thanks to my dad, and I love it. Best part of the gift tradition? Once you’ve set yours, you are golden for gift ideas on every occasion. Just continue the tradition! It’s a promise of the future of your relationship, and a special reminder of the specialness of that relationship.

2. The gift is about you, the giver, more than it is about the receiver. That moment where you’ve scored that something special for your loved ones? And their eyes gleam bright because you hit the nail on the head? That is the BEST feeling ever. But sometimes you will miss the target, and that’s okay. That’s why there are gift receipts. It’s better to shoot and fail then to tie yourself in knots and give nothing. It REALLY is the thought that counts.

3. Always go with your impulse. There is no nicer saying than “I saw this and I thought of you.” It’s heart warming. But that being said… don’t always impulse PURCHASE the item. Write it down for later. You might find something even better, but do NOT wait until the week of Christmas to complete your purchase. We, the retailers are picked clean by that point and that impulse item will be long gone.

4. Give something you love. This ties back into the gift is about the giver. You reveal a special part of yourself when you give a gift. Share that with your loved ones, they love you and giving something YOU love is sharing that love. I’ve found that my most cherished gifts are those that I would never have picked for myself, but once it’s mine, it’s so much more special because of that relationship that I have with the gift giver.

5. Stay within budget! This one is kind of derr but you can always find something special within budget. That’s the entire point of vintage. Don’t blow your money on the name. Tiffany’s costs more because it’s Tiffany’s, but is it worth more? No. Let me put it this way, do you want to give earrings and matching necklace for the same cost of one dinky little charm? YES. The answer is yes.

6. Customize! Always customize. If there’s ever an engraving or monogram or add her name option? Do it. It makes the item extra special. Years later she can look back and say “Oh yeah, that’s from Christmas 1994”.

7. Remember this is supposed to be FUN. There is no failure in gift giving. If you are unfortunate enough to have someone in your life who makes you feel bad about your gift choice? Well, they are serious jerks. That’s plain mean, inconsiderate and RUDE. They are crossed off the list for next year. No gift is deserved, gifts are wonderful opportunities to spoil the people you love, but if they are too bratty to appreciate that? Than they won’t appreciate anything ever. Don’t beat yourself up over their bad attitude. You tried your best.

Did you slog thru everything? No? No matter, I’m keeping this list in consideration and you just need to follow my recs. Starting Monday the 24th, for 16 days straight, I will give you a gift idea for every type. Trying to shop for someone specific? Tell me their fav TV shows or sports teams, interests, hobbies or anything and I’ll dedicate a post to it. You know I love this stuff. It’s the thrill of the jewelry hunt!!

Grenade Goes BOom

Cartography Grenade Heart Pendant

What do you do when you’ve thrown a grenade into your relationship? Purchase matching grenade necklace and earrings? Shoot, I am the worst at problem solving.

grenade earrings

Let me warn all women against this small little RAGE side effect of Estradiol. I had an awful, terrible weekend, capped with one too many hormone pills that magnify and blow out of proportion all emotions. Remember that time I got so angry with my honey that I threw out all of our food? Same pills. The Incredible Hulk’s got nothing on my estradioled self. Anyways, I was terrible, just horrible yelling at my poor honey. But it takes two to tango, if you know what I mean.

Can I offer you this grenade bracelet to go with a big helping of crazy?
grenade

Fortunately we’re made up now. But hormones! They’re not for wimps!! (All my guys-in-a-relationship-with-a-lady followers are currently nodding their heads sagely going ‘YUP, I coulda told you that. And the sky is blue.’)

Being Hit By A Truck vs. Infertility: which is the best?

IMG_3007.PNG

HIT BY A TRUCK   INFERTILITY
Pain YES X neglible
Heart ache neglible X YES
Cause Truck X Cause unknown
Weight change loss X gain
Ability to exercise not possible X not allowed
Time heals all wounds X is not a woman’s friend
Financial profit gain* X loss
Diagnosable psychological repercussions PTSD, panic disorder tie tie depression
Time off work many months paid leave X two days per IVF round unpaid leave
Frequency of strangers asking if you are pregnant daily by X-Ray techs but otherwise non occurring X Frequently because you are fat from hormones and lack of exercise
Ability of strangers asking if you are pregnant to make you cry Nope X Immense
Fun-ness of medications Very fun X No fun
Internet forums to discuss issues Maybe? Runoverbytruck.com? X Gobs
Risk of death High X No risk
Relatability of the situation Very, everybody has experienced pain and can imagine being hit by truck X Not very, except by others who have experienced it
Root of fear that being hit by a truck contributed to infertility Yes X No

Conclusion, being hit by a truck is better than infertility by a landslide! Lesson here, always choose being hit by a truck. Wholesale ducky hospital ID bracelets available at PDC Healthcare

*conditional upon fault of insured truck driver

Nano Wrimothoasitheslnt

That’s how you spell it, right?

It took me a very long time to figure out what that acronym meant. I’m significantly better with anagrams than acronyms. Not kidding. Like the WR in football, I keep wanting to call it a Right Wing. Since I know that’s wrong I continue to call those guys the WR, to my husband’s huge annoyance. He has definitely explained it to me many times but it just doesn’t stick. However, give me the daily jumble and I can see the words. They just manifest themselves to me without any effort. It’s probably thanks in part to special skills I learned a while ago at a very unique job. A job that was the inspiration for a story.

That job was working in a casino.

Nope. No Mahjong here, buster.

I was a supervisor, basically my company’s equivalent of a PitBoss. Anyway, that was a lifetime ago. Then I was run over by a truck, and invalided at my mom’s house. As a needing-to-do-something-creative-at-all-times kind of person, writing was the logical course of action. Frankly, I couldn’t do anything else. I wasn’t physically capable of it. I was in a lot of pain and needing to process what I had experienced.

No dice either.

I should probably clarify that I had recently started a new very regular type job at the time I was run over. But obviously, some of the stress reverberations from my time at the casino still needed working on, too. So it all came out. Almost dying gave me a goal. I want to publish a book.

I do need dis!!

The story transitioned from a diary of pain, to a fictionalized account of my life, to a totally fictional thriller type story set in a casino and one of the side characters gets hit by a bus. Reading those first drafts is painful. Literally full of pain, and it hurts to read. But it’s come a long way. I have an editor who has helped improve my writing by leaps and bounds. Now, like everybody else hoping to get the door slammed in their face, I’m preparing to start soliciting agents.

Which brings me to Woo Irn Man… errr Nano Wrimo

I think I want to participate. But writing this blog distracts me so much (in a good way). This blog gives me a purpose in a way that I really need right now while I’m dealing with the bad shit in my life. Do people do both? Maintain their blogs and write a story? Have you done it before, are you doing it now? Give me insight please!

Note about the bracelets: today the pictures link to their websites if you are interested in them. A quick note, neither Mah Jong nor dice games were offered at my casino, but I can’t find any Pai Gow jewelry to showcase.

Wordpressing Onwards

You may notice I changed my blog layout. Yay for me! It took a depressingly long time to tweak everything. I was all “Widgets? Are they chewy? Sure, I guess I’ll try a couple.” Let’s just say I’m not the most tech savvy individual. Which is ironic because for my shop, I am my own IT guy. Everything I know about tech support I learned from the British tech tutorial The IT Crowd.

Primarily I’m afraid I’ll do something that will alter everything and I won’t know how to undo it ever again. To this day there’s a damn pin it button that haunts my web browser. PIN IT! It cries in the night…. pin it. Happy Halloween, pin it ghost button. I don’t know how it got there yet it pops up on top of every single picture I look at. And yes, I’ve tried turning the computer off then back on again.

Anyway, I’m pretty pleased with my slightly changed blog. Going thru this process got me thinking about all those templates. I googled WordPress Jewelry theme. Are those actual real websites? If not, what bracelets do the templates offer? And people make all sorts of fan jewelry, is there WordPress fan jewelry? Can I pin it? Just kidding, I never pin anything. I’m hoping eventually my pin it ghost will become discouraged and leave. So. How meta would you like to be this morning? Very? Good, come sit next to me.

IMG_2939.PNG

On one pretty jewelry blog layout I found this sparkler. They call it the “Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet” bracelet. Ah, so true, there is no one who loves pain. Which is probably the pain of all the jewelry on this site named the same thing.

The bracelet blurb was very informative:
Remember that barbarians liked all shiny and bright things even if those were absolutely useless. Probably we have inherited this weakness.

I think I might like these barbarians.

The one thing that would keep me from pulling the trigger on imaginarily purchasing this bracelet is the math. Somehow it doesn’t totally add up. Looks like they confused the discount amount of $4 with the discount amount + tax on the original cost. I’m sorry imaginary online boutique, but you can’t throw tax into a discount total, especially when you don’t actually remove the tax. Why, if you were a real business I would shake my fist at you so hard.

Oh I forgot to mention that this template sells both Cartier and Jessica Simpson jewelry. Now that is a combo!

All of these mockup templates cracked me up in their details. There is the “Jewelry for Real Ladies” template. 50% off now with the discount code dungeon. Any time you’ve got to include the descriptor “real” in front of the word “ladies”, I assume you are talking about one of two types of people. Prostitutes and/or drag queens. The dungeon discount code doubles down on my suspicions.

Finally I moved on to check Etsy for WordPress fan jewelry. Of which I found something but It wasn’t what I had hoped.

IMG_2940.PNG
This one boutique IreneDesigns2011 turns up in the search. Everything of hers, I can’t figure out why. It doesn’t look like fan jewelry right?

Anyway, it’s time to address my final question. Yes, you can pin all of these things. Now, what’s a widget?

15 Fall DIYs That Will Make Any Fall Lover Rejoice

Getting up this morning I realized I have ZERO Halloween/Fall themed bracelets. I just read this great post by Lame Adventures about Candy Corn, which I love. Apparently it’s not a popular candy. WHAT! Candy Corn is the ESSENCE of candy. Corn syrup. That’s all. CANDY. But so, I think I need to do this little Candy Corn DIY and make myself a Candy Corn bracelet. It will probably keep until next year because, unfortunately, this project is a little late for today.

Crafted in Carhartt

15 Fall DIYs / Crafted in CarharttDIY PUMPKIN BOWLS
15 Fall DIYs / Crafted in CarharttDIY APPLE CIDER IN APPLE CUPS
15 Fall DIYs / Crafted in CarharttDIY APPLE VOTIVES
15 Fall DIYs / Crafted in CarharttDIY CANDY CORN NECKLACE
15 Fall DIYs / Crafted in CarharttDIY CANDY CORN GARLAND
15 Fall DIYs / Crafted in CarharttDIY CANDY CORN T-SHIRT
15 Fall DIYs / Crafted in CarharttDIY STICK HEART
15 Fall DIYs / Crafted in CarharttDIY JEWELRY ORGANIZER
15 Fall DIYs / Crafted in CarharttDIY LEAF DECORATIONS
15 Fall DIYs / Crafted in CarharttDIY INFINITY LEAF SCARF
15 Fall DIYs / Crafted in CarharttDIY PUMPKIN SEED GRANOLA
15 Fall DIYs / Crafted in CarharttDIY PUMPKIN SEED TRAIL MIX
15 Fall DIYs / Crafted in CarharttDIY GIANT POMPOM BEANIE
15 Fall DIYs / Crafted in CarharttDIY ELBOW PATCHES
15 Fall DIYs / Crafted in CarharttDIY JACKET EMBROIDERY

Happy Halloween! What is it about fall that gets you in the crafting mood? I’ve put together a list of 15 seasonal crafts that can be just for fun, help bring life to a fall party, or add to any Thanksgiving celebration. The thing I like about the projects above is that they can be done on the cheap. Creativity mixed with a little elbow grease can go a long way.

1. DIY PUMPKIN BOWLS
2. DIY APPLE CIDER IN APPLE CUPS
3. DIY APPLE VOTIVES
4. DIY CANDY CORN NECKLACE
5. DIY CANDY…

View original post 48 more words