11.18.14 rhinestones are forever

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You guys remember that Bond film, right? Rhinestones are forever? If not forever, per se, they are at least decent amounts of time. “Rhinestones are decent amounts of time” doesn’t have the right ring, however. It’s not exactly catchy.

Today I’m wearing my Goodwill bow bracelet, my sterling knot from Hiho Silver, and a vintage rhinestone piece I was given for being a bridesmaid. Best yet?? Rhinestone panda clip ons. Now pandas, they are forever.

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No Isht, Sherlock

Long time no TV fan jewelry, eh??? Thanks to Mrs. Bliss that’s all about to change. She LOVES Sherlock! Shhh… don’t tell her husband. Though, I’m guessing this is probably not a secret. We all have our TV show loves, right? (Hey there, Raylon Gibbons *seductive wink* fancy a bourbon sometime?) Actually, now that I’m thinking about it, Mrs. Bliss did not specify a special love for Sherlock the man, per se, but the TV show.

IRREGARDLESS!!! <—– yes, intentional

I took it upon myself to scope out the BBC merchandise shop. Did you know they offer a Monty Python watch?
Monty Python watch
It’s not nearly as cool as I would want a Monty Python watch to be.

Unfortunately for Sherlock fans, the BBC sells only tweed items.
BBC tweed
Yo, BBC, I don’t want to be Sherlock, I want to wear his pretty face around my wrist. Like a talisman to remind me that the dog not barking means something. What exactly, I can’t remember. So off to Etsy I go!

Sherlock Quote
Ha ha! Remember this Sherlockism? I am not a psychopath. Uh huh. Just a high functioning sociopath, right? If I hear that pick-up line one more time…Emery Drive made this hand stamped cuff. I feel like I’m cheating a little with this one. It’s so similar to my favorite Buffy Grrrr Argghh cuff from my TV and Jewelry post. But I love the “I’m not a psychopath”! What else could offer so little comfort?

Sherlock
Now this Sherlock silhouette by Karamboola is not our Sherlock. I like the cameo style of it, however. Wouldn’t it be great with the two silhouettes of our Sherlock and our Watson facing each other? You are welcome to the idea, Sherlock cameo bracelet makers of the world. Because, who is Sherlock without Watson? A lonely man, that’s who.

Which brings me to my favorite of the Etsy selection. Best Friends Forever, like Sherlock and Watson, need a symbol of their devoted friendship. In lieu of the traditional two-pieces-of-the-same-heart best friends charm necklace, let me propose this pair of cuffs.
BFF
Won’t you be my Watson? This saying will be all over the friendship Valentine’s next February. Just you wait and see. Until then, remember that Sherlock solves crimes and I blog about them. Well, me and Watson both.

Guest Blog by Natalina 11.9.14

Today we have a very special guest, my niece Natalina (8 years old) who is the master of Rainbow/Crazy Loom bracelet making.

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How do you make these crazy loom bracelets?

Natalina: First you get your rack then you get your hook. And you get two or more color rubber bands. Then you read the instructions on which bracelet you would like to make. Once you choose one, you follow the pattern on how to put your rubber bands on your rack. Then loom the rubberbands like it says on the instructions. Then you’ll find that there’s one rubberband that you can put the C clip that’s clear that you put on one rubberband. Then you lift it up slowly, if it falls apart, retry. If it doesn’t, keep lifting and once you have one rubberband left on there, put the other end of your C clip on there and lift up.

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Above are a few of Natalina’s creations and below is the special fish tail one she made for me.

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I’m a lucky Auntie.

When bracelets stop being polite and start getting real…

Lame. Real lame.

Guys? I feel like I really need to address something pretty effing disturbing. The Walking Dead online shop offers just one dinky little Livestrong type bracelet.

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I’m, um, well, I’m bothered.

*clears throat*

This just seems like something the Walking Dead crew pussed out on. I might even go so far to say that as fan, I’m insulted by this bracelet. Insulted by crappy $6.99 rubber bracelets! And it’s out of stock. Which I just don’t understand because I’m certain the manufacturer defaults LITERALLY to quantities of ten thousand. So they’ve already sold at least ten thousand units of crappy bands? Who is buying that shit?

There’s probably a floating trash heap in the Atlantic the size of Georgia made up exclusively of Livestrong bracelets. Why’s TWD getting in on that pollution? The Livestrong bracelets are basically the zombies of the bracelet world. Imagine, that pollution herd of stupid, highly contagious bracelets that eat away at your pocketbook. Before you know it your arm is swarmed with colors: yellow Livestrong, pink Breast Cancer Awareness, red Micah’s Bar Mitzvah, black Free Car Wash Giveaway. White The Walking Dead.

*hangs head*

Save yourself. Whatever you do, don’t let this bracelet latch onto your wrist. And come on, The Walking Dead, I hold you to a higher standard.

P.S. My honey gave me the side eyes for using the term “pussed out” so I apologize for using strong language but sometimes it’s the best way to communicate an emotion.

Friends

My friend Ross and I were driving around aimlessly, you know, probably stuck in second gear after stopping at our local coffee shop when we came across a garage sale. I insisted we pullover so I could root thru all the junk. What I purchased was a a charm bracelet that was supposed to spell out FRIENDS but instead spelled out FRIED. That’s what you get when your life is not a sitcom. And when you spend fifty cents on jewelry. Man, I wish I could find that bracelet.

Instead let’s talk friendship bracelets. If you are a girl and/or were ever 11 years old and/or ever boarded at summer camp, then you know about friendship bracelets. You know you are supposed make them for your friends, give them out, tie them on and wear them until they rot off your wrist. So it very much feels like cheating to even consider purchasing one but… This girl on Etsy makes the CUTEST friendship bracelets.

FRUITS!! by Knotty As Can Be for $12.50.

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COLORS!! For $12.90!

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FAIR ISLE!! $9.95!!!

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Wow, I am so impressed by the friendship bracelet making skillzzz of Knotty As Can Be. These bracelets will be there for you, when the rain starts to pour. Thanks to Cassandra’s Corner for reminding me what a great show Friends is, yet how unlike the show my life is.

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McQueened

It was maybe a year before Alexander McQueen’s suicide that I was visiting a friend in New York. He, my friend, is someone who rotates career wise between the fashion industry and the design industry so his taste is impeccable. Anyway, he said to me “With your figure, you should wear Alexander McQueen.” I nodded agreeably and thought to myself “I should wear Alexander McQueen!” And then my spoilsport pocketbook chimed in and said “Oh no, you should not.”

Damn you financial responsibility! You ruin all my fun. But that’s where McQ enters the scene, stage left.

I adore this $80 razor blade wrap bracelet because I imagine myself a badass (shh… I know I’m not, I was the kid who was kicked for wearing knee socks, after all, but let me have my fantasies!)

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What do you guys think of this tough as nails charm bracelet below for $200?

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More like harm bracelet, amirite?

In summary, maybe I should wear Alexander McQueen, and to keep a happy pocketbook, I’ll stick to the McQ jewelry. Je le vaux bien!

No Hermes today 8.23.14

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This is a sentimental collection of silver bracelets. Rhinestone gorgeousness from India courtesy of my best friend, a silver Tiffany’s bangle my dad gave me in 1993, a silver Tiffany’s floral cuff my dad gave me for my birthday last year, and a slight hook clasp bangle from Tiffany’s I received for being a deb in 1997. Despite all evidence to the contrary I’m not all *that* fancy. I even have proof! An online quiz gave rated me as 60% fancy.