The Walking Dora

The other day I asked Dora about her second favorite TV show because her first favorite is The Walking Dead, and I’ve already sought out zombie jewelry about twelve times now. Here I found the disappointing branded Walking Dead store, here I covered all things zombie and here I took down the MAN in my TWD, Sex Ed Fail post.

Maybe we can admit two things straight off the bat. First, I am prone to exaggeration. Second, I’ve probably beaten the zombie bracelet theme to death. Unfortunately for you all, it then rose from the dead and bit me ONE MORE TIME. Because, guess what? Dora and I both love TWD that much! I’m throwing Sup Darling under the wheels of the zombie bus as well. How’s that for human remains in the exhaust pipe, huh? Whatchu got to say about that?!

First up, what the fresh noise is this thing that Rick’s holding??
Ring
I found it on the Craufthaus website, made by a Rebecca Rose. I don’t know about you, but to me this looks an awful lot like a Walking Dead scene atop a ring. Which is kind of awesome.

BLoody Charms
Now, I’ve showcased some zombie charm bracelets before but this one is different in that it is significantly bloodier. MM hmm blood. Made by Antonis Art Asylum on Etsy. Talk about dedication to authenticity! But wait.. shouldn’t these tools be covered in blackish green blood if they were used on the zombies… um?? Are these tools from the Governor’s toolbox? :/ Ahem. Moving onwards!

five gold skulls
I want a five gold skull trophy bracelet! Emphasis on ‘skull trophy’ not ‘trophy bracelet’. I guess technically, this is a necklace but I’m sure we can contact Starta, the designer, maybe he would hook a fellow zombiephile up? He should for the amount of money these gold skulls cost. I’d like to point out his TWD necklace is on display right next to his cuddly teddy bear charm necklace. Watch your back, Teddy. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

skull cuff
OMG even Polyvore is getting in on the zombie hookups. This skulls and skins brings a little bit of skull to that classy bracelet collection of yours. Or mine.

There you have it, there is no bottom to the zombie/jewelry pit. Please enjoy the view of all the skulls while we free fall thru this together. Just a quick aside: I’m writing this while listening to some MJ, and I just realized Man in the Mirror is the Governor’s jam. Make that change. Or not. Shamo.

11.12.14 year of living undangerously

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If you could go back in time, live your life over knowing what you know now, what would you do differently?

Me, I have a laundry list of items.
-Don’t bother with that ‘My So Called Life’ letter writing campaign, Angela Chase is over.
-Love is easy. Worrying if you are phoning someone too much is a sign that they are the wrong person. The right person will welcome all your phone calls AND visit you in the hospital after knowing you for just seven days.
-Chewing on your lip repeatedly DOES cause wrinkles.
-January 22, 2007? Don’t ride the bike to work. Take the day off, why don’t you.
-Credit cards do NOT buy happiness, cut those puppies up.
-That time your flight lays over in Heathrow and you are the only one there who recognizes the RZA? Go say hi, tell him you’re a fan.
-That self destructive phase? Not worth it.

That last one there is something that I still struggle with. It’s easy when everything hurts to look for an outlet, a fight, drugs, sex, anything to make yourself feel better. It’s hard NOT to, even. But I’m too old for that. My hangover will be too brutal, the downs far outweigh the ups. But today hurts. I’m officially an IVF round two drop out. My body isn’t responding to the drugs. I’ve only got one little follicle to show for it. Not enough to proceed.

Today’s bangles: my dad’s Rolex, silver sea shell charm bracelet, polymer clay bracelets

11.11.14 sunny San Fra-no-freezie

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It’s totally not freezie today, or at all, or maybe ever again even. SF is never cold enough to snow, but it does get charmingly brisk this time of year. USUALLY. But I don’t know, this drought and warm spell? It continues to stretch out before us now, making most SFers grouchy. It leaves my bedroom uncomfortably warm at night! Nobody knows how to deal with this! We aren’t equipped for warm weather. Should I wear sandals? Or will I get cold by the end of the day? I just don’t know!

Today’s bangles are: brass bow bracelet, silver bangle, Guadalquivir bangle by HermΓ¨s, seashell charm bracelet, Tiffany’s silver latch bangle, and my extra special Crazy Loom bracelet from my niece.

Guest blogger Briar Rose and her bracelet collection

Two days, two guest bloggers! Today I welcome my five year old niece, Briar Rose*.

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πŸŒˆπŸŒ…πŸŽŽπŸ’πŸŽ―πŸŒ™πŸŒπŸŒ“πŸŒΉπŸŒΊπŸŒΌπŸ˜πŸ˜˜πŸ˜‡βœ¨πŸ‘„πŸ‘°πŸ’–πŸŽ€πŸ’˜πŸ’ŒπŸ’πŸ’ŽπŸ’”πŸ’—πŸ’‹β›²οΈ
(Sentence above typed by Briar Rose herself)

Briar Rose: I like to play with my jewelry and my makeup box. What the box is is a makeup fake box with princesses on it. And it comes with fake makeup. What I do with my bracelets, I play with them and pack purses with them. That’s it.

(I ask, what is your favorite bracelet?)

The charm bracelet is my favorite.

(This girl clearly knows how to work her Auntie, the giver of the charm bracelet.)

*writer’s pseudonym

McSnobbery

Let’s all admit something right here right now. We’re all of us snobs about something. I happen to be a snob about many things. Most of these things relate directly to what I perceive as the destruction of our unique communities. A national homogenization that will soon come back to bite us in the butts.

fast food jewelry

Amazon, for example. I am extremely anti-Amazon.com. They kill the small business in several shitty ways. But, not only that, they don’t add anything to your community. Locally owned businesses reinvest in the local economy at a 60% higher rate than chain and internet retailers. If you are interested in how chain stores affect your community I recommend reading the SF LoMA website. Don’t even get me started on Apple. You know their “headquarters” are in Ireland, right? Which saves them a buttload in taxes. It’s cheating, in my opinion.

So I am pretty snobby about where I spend my dollars. I have very high ideals. Shop local, walk primarily, no fur products ever, buy quality products that are made in the USA from companies that don’t use unregulated laborers, buy products not tested on animals, be a conscientious shopper. I’ve watched every Morgan Spurlock documentary.

But that all flies out the window when it comes to McDonald’s.
McD
There’s a couple of McDonald’s locations in SF. Maybe three, and I never go to them. That is my ideological concession. I can eat McDonald’s but only on road-trips. And we are hitting the road tonight! Which means MCDONALD’S DINNER FOR MARGARET, YO!! I am so excited.

Charm bracelet made by and available at Fiction Jewellery (Yes, the Brits spell jewelry all wonky.)
Moschino purse available at Net A Porter

11.1.14 no good

So I was extremely excited to brag a little about my day yesterday. It was quiet at the shop until LINDA RONSTADT walked in! She bought some soaps, and a nightgown. She hadn’t signed the back of her credit card and I made a little joke like “How on earth are you going to prove who you are?” Or something. I swear it was smoother than that, though. Anyways, she has shopped with me before but it still gives me a mild heart attack. LINDA RONSTADT.

She’s my most famous customer, though one time Danielle Steele’s assistant phoned looking for a full length, zip up cashmere robe. Because, who doesn’t need one of those? And Adam Savage from Myth Busters bought slippers once, but on a day I was out. And my silly 20 year old employee didn’t recognize him. Twenty year olds, I swear.

But so, I was all “I can’t wait to blog about this! This is the most exciting thing to happen to me.” That is, until the gunshots on my corner this morning.

Yep. Gunshots on my corner. If you know SF I bet you can guess where I live. It’s not Hunter’s Point, go with your second guess. This is part of the heart break about SF. I live across the street from a church, and behind the church are the projects. But on my block there are million dollar homes.

Everybody swarmed outside with the arrival of the cops, medics, and fire engines. My side of the street basically 100% white, the other side of the street 100% black. It’s shocking this clear cut division of racial and economic lines. White people = million dollar homes, black people = projects. Like I said, it’s heart breaking.

The shooting happened in our corner store, the ambulance rolled a black man out on the stretcher and loaded him in. An air mask was strapped to his face, so he wasn’t dead at the moment. But we don’t know now.

What I don’t understand is this: how are any guns ever allowed in SF proper? No one should have guns here, there is zero reason except to shoot a fellow human. Self defense argument or not, that means the only reason anyone carries a gun in this city is to shoot another person. We don’t have deer, we don’t have skeet shooting, the closest shooting range is in San Bruno. Again, the only reason a person in SF has a gun is to shoot another person. So it stuns me that the NRA recently lobbied for guns to be allowed in the projects. And they were successful.

That’s it. I’ll get off my soap box now. Argue with me if you want, and I’ll know you are the kind of person who thinks it’s acceptable for a human being to shoot another human being. It’s as simple as that.

3:30 PM UPDATE: the shooting victim died and the suspect is still at large.

Today’s bangles are Paris by Maximal Art, Paris themed charm bracelet from Goodwill, and Hermes Tohu Bohu bangle.

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Do you feel lucky, punk?

Well do you? No! I don’t! The answer is no, I don’t feel all that lucky. Something around here’s got to change, and I think I know what it is. I don’t have enough figas. I really don’t! I have just the one charm for a necklace, and one jade figa that hangs in my bathroom. Not early enough.

Oh what’s a figa? You ask.

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This here, these are my figas. Only in the brain of the gently paranoid and inexplicably superstitious would a life change come down to the closed fist charms, the figas. But that’s where I’m at right now.

Though I just remembered my jade figa fell and broke a while back, I crazy glued it together, but you think that has altered it’s powers? I’m only partially joking with this question. I am not, for the most part, a superstitious individual. Nor am I some hippy who believes in the regenerative powers of crystals or any of that nonsense. But this feeling, that maybe some little thing will help, still itches under my skin.

The figa is a Brazilian thing. My first one was given to me a long time ago. Along with a coral tooth charm. It brings luck, protection and fertility. All things I need now. Conclusion: I need more figas.

This is the one I want.

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I found it on 1stdibs.com via Polyvore but it’s no longer available. So I’m going to make one.

First I’ll showcase some other options out there. These two just do not have enough figas for my needs but reading about the Made With Love Project I like their cause to raise money through the production and sale of products to provide a fair income for women.IMG_2794.JPG

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The bracelets are $30 to 40 bucks. Very reasonable.

This bracelet from Wicked Magpie on Etsy is interesting because it’s identified as Peruvian.

IMG_2796.PNG Which llamas, horse whips makes sense but I never knew figas were South American outside of Brazil. It’s $28.

Also available on etsy are the figa charms in agate, ebony, jacaranda, and other materials that vary in price. To make my bracelet though, I think I will first check out the SF Hobby Co because of my preference to support local independent businesses. Side note, that’s why I never post links to Amazon and I try to avoid chain chainstore links too. But Etsy is the best internet hub of small business, so I do post to them. In case you were ever wondering.

Wish me luck!

McQueened

It was maybe a year before Alexander McQueen’s suicide that I was visiting a friend in New York. He, my friend, is someone who rotates career wise between the fashion industry and the design industry so his taste is impeccable. Anyway, he said to me “With your figure, you should wear Alexander McQueen.” I nodded agreeably and thought to myself “I should wear Alexander McQueen!” And then my spoilsport pocketbook chimed in and said “Oh no, you should not.”

Damn you financial responsibility! You ruin all my fun. But that’s where McQ enters the scene, stage left.

I adore this $80 razor blade wrap bracelet because I imagine myself a badass (shh… I know I’m not, I was the kid who was kicked for wearing knee socks, after all, but let me have my fantasies!)

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What do you guys think of this tough as nails charm bracelet below for $200?

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More like harm bracelet, amirite?

In summary, maybe I should wear Alexander McQueen, and to keep a happy pocketbook, I’ll stick to the McQ jewelry. Je le vaux bien!

9.22.14 running around like a swan with it’s head cut off

IMG_2595.JPG Today’s bangles: the 3 OG bangles that started it all and the silver shell charm bracelet. The trio remains unknown in name despite the research excursion my mom and I took today to HermΓ¨s. This was after the dermatologist visit where the doctor removed my black swan. No fear! It’s not a swan, or any bad thing, but a skin bump that reminds me of that scene in Black Swan where she picks and picks at herself until she plucks the black swan feathers from beneath her skin. Too gross? I apologize. There weren’t even any feathers involved. Just a little bump that was cauterized and now I’m as good as new.