11.4.14 the Gilmore conundrum

IMG_2966.JPG
If I were a graduate student studying modern American television (people totally do that, right? TV Studies? No?) I’d write my thesis on the Gilmore Girls. Specifically the dynamic between Lorelei Gilmore and Rory Gilmore. The title would be Lorelei & Rory: the role of the dominant and the submissive in family dynamics. And then I’d write about that. But since this is a blog, I get to cheat and invent imaginary thesis titles without actually needing to do any leg work.

Ugh! I can’t even explain the insidious addiction of this show. I never watched it first time around. Then when it became available on Netflix streaming I figured I ought to give it a shot because people I respect love it. It turns out it’s awful. But I can’t stop watching!

I hate Lorelei. She’s so smug and self absorbed. Basically selfishly forcing her daughter to be her best friend. I just can’t get behind this whole mom + daughter = best friend thing. It’s weird! Yo. I talk to my mom every day, I see her in person multiple times per week. I have a great relationship with my mom. But she’s my mom, not my best friend. Side note, I also find it creepy when spouses call each other “best friends”. Anyway, Lorelei is so intent on being “cool” and quasi witty that she’s awful and obnoxious to her entire community. Including her own parents! Come on already, grow up, Lorelei!

Oh, and the theme song? It’s the worst. THE WORST. For all the effort the show goes to name dropping bands (Belle & Sebastian, Metallica, I heard some Rammstein, Otis Redding) you’d think they would have a decent theme song. But no. It’s the worst. If you’re curious what song it is it’s Where You Lead by Carole King. Listen, I may be down with Linda Ronstadt but no thank you, Carole King. You can take what you are selling elsewhere.

Oh, hello broken English Korean mom. What are you doing here? Why? Why must Mrs. Kim speak broken English? Her grammar is nearly impeccable but the writer’s love dropping the verb every once in a while. It’s so inconsistent! ESL people tend to be consistent in the idiosyncrasies of their speech. The Vietnamese family down the street sell “gingersnappers” at their sandwich shop. Which I think is ridiculously cute, BUT it’s always gingersnappers. Well, except when it’s chocolate chip cookie day. Then there’s no gingersnappers. Consistency.

Besides, I can hear Mrs. Kim’s American accent behind the awful fake Korean accent. Why must they do this? There are so few Asians on TV to begin with, must the token ones be such a stereotype? I’m looking at you Two Broke Girls. You’re part of the problem, too.

So there’s a lot, A LOT that I dislike about this show and yet…. I can’t stop watching it. Where you lead, I will follow, apparently. Like a lobotomized rat, I hate the maze but I can’t escape it. Poor rat 😦

It’s Rory. She is the cheese that makes the maze worth while. But now she’s getting all mixed up with this bad kid, Jess. I’m worried she’s going to cheat on Dean. Stupid Lorelei almost had a decent moment of parenting, nearly pointing out this kid Jess’s many flaws, but then she blew it. As usual. So right now I’m just so concerned for Rory and her future. Oh, yeah, I like Paris, Kirk and Suki too. It’s these characters that outweigh the general awfulness of the show.

Now hush, Jess is cleaning the gutters and I know he has that bracelet of Rory’s. I just hope she figures out he is terrible before she jeopardizes her relationship.

Today’s bracelets are assymetrical brass Goodwill find now up at my shop, tiny HiHo Silver knot, cream Clic Clac, chain of silver hearts, and silver ID bracelet that read WWRS from Goodwill. I’m guessing that R is for Rita since she ‘loves ya’ on the flip side.

Games people play

You know that game “If you could live in any era, when would it be?” It’s not nearly as fun as FMK. But so, it always amazes me when people pick these supposedly glamorous times that actually would have sucked to a. live in and to b. live in as a woman and/or a person of color.

The Victorian Age probably ranks up there as one of those overly romanticized and actually probably pretty awful periods that are often picked. People seem to forget that the Victorians went to the bathroom in bowls in their bedrooms. They kept that container under the bed. Then they discarded it’s contents OUT THE WINDOW! It was a FILTHY time!

But damn, they made some pretty jewelries. This one is available on the Past Era website and can be yours for $6950!

IMG_2882.JPG I met the people from Past Era at the SF Fall Antiques Show. They were so nice and gracious when I asked them about their bracelets and if I could take pictures for my blog. Here’s my shot, a pile o antique bracelets.

IMG_2873.JPG
I think they were maybe even a little impressed with my 42 blog followers. Do not dare to correct me! *sigh* I would probably be okay with suffering through a little consumption to get my hands on one of those darlings.

If you want to talk eras, let’s talk Scythian. Dude. NEVER pick Scythian when you are playing the era game because what if some weird wormhole magically develops and instantly transports you to your era of choice and you just fucking picked SCYTHIAN! Do you like war? And tribal living? Raising ox for slaughter and starving to death during times of famine? How do you feel about pillaging and rape? Well you will love the Scythians! I mean, even if you picked the Scythians because of their gold work, you can just buy their gold now for the reasonable sum of $35000 from Ollemans.

IMG_2875.JPG If you give me the option of Mongolia under the reign of Genghis Kahn or Sycthians, I would pick Genghis Khan because I 💗💗🐴.

I guess after those last two picks, roaring twenties (another popular choice) has some appeal. But we’re talking life pre-Penicillin, women and blacks were still considered the legal property of men, and the Great Depression was looming on the horizon. No thank you!

If I could go back in time, to any time, first I would choose the time of dinosaurs, but being the only human would probably get kind of lonely. Then I’d choose 2 years ago because life was pretty good two years ago, and it would give me the chance to do some major things differently.

Now, FMK? Lorelai Gillmore, Darryl from the Walking Dead, Carl from the Walking Dead? Trick question because there’s two kills in there.